Metro Moments

When we go somewhere on the bus, we try to pick up a Metro, the free daily newspaper designed for commuters, with digestible snippets of the Big News, plus some local information and varied entertainment.

We like to save it to read at home over a cup of tea and a crunchy Honey & Oat biscuit. To dunk or not to dunk? Not to - then let the bite dissolve in the tea as you drink it, of course!

Don't forget to click on the photos to see bigger images, or better still, open in a new tab or window.

The letters / texts page is always a hoot. Why a hoot? I wonder, we're not owls. Humans get really hot under the collar about all sorts of things, from other-people gripes like queue-jumpers or nose pickers, to larger issues like the environment (fracking, for example) and Scottish Independence. 

Alice tried to find the origin of hot under the collar for me (the phrase just slipped out, I do confess) but only came up with something about Rhetorical Tropes on a website about Semiotics, which was totally beyond me. She has put in the links, but honestly, I wouldn't bother...

But to get back to The Metro and its unique delights. Today we had photos of  skateboarding mice. Really.

The paper also has a number of regular cartoons, which are often quite fun. Even Alice, whose sense of humour is more restricted than mine, sometimes laughs at them. I think our favourtie is the Learn to Speak Cat series. It's both verbal and visual. Follow the link above, then the one to the facebook page. You don't have to belong or log-in (Alice totally refuses to have any dealings at all with that organisation) but just click on Photos to see lots of examples.

Here is the one that got us prompted to write this particular post. It was on Monday, 5 August. Alice did hoot at it, too.

You must know by now that we're quite keen on "Doing Art", even though our tastes differ somewhat. You'll get the reference to this cartoon if you've been following us from the start and recall that Alice actually enjoyed the Damien Hirst exhibition at the Tate in May 2012. I thought it was a load of pretentious old rubbish, but she says it's Conceptual Art and actually very clever.

See a photo of the original at totallycoolpix. Apparently the first one rotted (Hah!) but the artist went to work on a second one. It's title is The Physical Impossibility of Death in the Mind of Someone Living.   See?    I rest my case.

Bees, blood and beauty...

I don't know who among you has been enjoying the UK's spell of hot weather this July. Alice actually finds it very troublesome, because it aggravates her hives. No, she doesn't mean annoying the bees, it's her "Urticaria". I don't think you'd really want to know - honestly.

Bees
But speaking of bees, we've seen several harvesting pollen from our lovely window boxes! But they've always flown away before Alice gets the window open and her camera ready for close focus. This photo therefore is a toal cheat, as you might just spot if you look carefully. But I asked Alice to concoct it, and she usually does her best to keep me happy.

Were they honey bees or bumble? I think it's hard to tell the difference, myself.

Bees are in trouble at the moment, too. Their population is declining alarmingly and no-one's 100% sure of the cause, or causes, though there's lots of theories. Very worrying indeed, if you consider the implications. Pollination, crops, and all that. Have a look here.

Blood on TV
Ah - blood. Yes, we've seen quite a lot of it, on screens large and small, recently. That's relatively recently, anyway, becuase there have been big gaps in our blogging.

Well, first on TV there was the terribly shocking (especially if you haven't read the book) slaughter in HBO's Game of Thrones, Season 3 episode 9, The Rains of Castamere.

It was very nasty altogether, and pretty gorey. This photo is of a guy who calls himself NikiPod on Facebook - in case anyone wants to know.

If you're some-one who doesn't have Sky (or can't, like us, babysit for someone who has) and who's going to have to wait til next February (yes, that long!) to get your box set, or still hasn't read the books, don't look at this review at IGN!

And you might not even be willing to risk watching this video of the reaction of a bunch of friends, or this compilation of several such. They don't show the scene in question, but there are hints, plus a soundtrack of clashing noises and screams.

Interesting how many in the know set up their cameras to record the shock and horror of their nearest and dearest!

Warning: Don't click on the next two links if you don't want any hints at all! George R R Martin (the guy on the left) author of the books, explained that this bit of his plotting was loosely based on Scottish history - The Black Dinner of 1440 and the notorious Glencoe Massacre in 1692.


For those who are in the know or just don't care about spoilers, there's a brilliant creation on YouTube: Hitler finds out about the R.. W... No, I won't expand.

It's a cleverly sub-titled scene from the excellent German film Downfall, starring that great actor Bruno Ganz.

Blood on film
We've not reported on many movies lately, mainly because none have struck us as being on a par with our fabulous favourites at the beginning of 2013.

Byzantium, however, is something of an original. Yes, it's a vampire story, but nothing like Neil Jordan's previous 1994 offering Interview with the Vampire. Alice says that was a bit tediously repetitive, one bite after another. This time there are no fangs or bites as such, but a more subtle finger nail.

The pricipal characters are two women, mother and daughter. They're not really supposed to have become vampires at all, according to the patriarchal Vampire Brotherhood. The tale of their initiation is an unusual and fanciful myth-like event, with mountains and simply huge torrents of blood. But we grow to like these renegades (we did, anyway) and their kind-of-feminist campaign. It's beautifully filmed (largely in Hastings, by the way) and all the acting is excellent.

Beauty

The other film we have appreciated lately is Renoir. As one of the critics says, it was shot with an eye for bucolic splendor by the cinematographer Mark Ping Bing Lee. There's another interesting review in the Guardian (with lots of links.)

Set during the elderly and ailing master painter's last years, it relates the impact on his whole household made by the arrival of an incredibly beautiful young woman who becomes his model. There are many luscious scenes of her posing nude in the heavenly golden light of Provence, on the actual Renoir estate.

We listen to Renoir's personal philosohpy: the flesh is all that matters. If you have not understood that, you have understood nothing. The painting is brilliantly portrayed, apparently using an expert forger to make the brush strokes!

Arriving on the scene later is his son, Jean, wounded in the war and soon to become famous as a filmmaker.  The plot, such as there is, thickens here...

Although all the lovliness is undeniable, we are not allowed to forget the horrors of war and death, which make a subtle counterpoint to the beauty. Well worth watching, or getting the DVD later.

Sorry. Way behind...

I only managed to persuade Alice to at least try and catch up a  bit, by saying she could put up the recent photos, but not worry too much about the worthy information, the obscure links, and all that jazz.

Of course that's the part she takes so much pride in. I'm sure my dear followers just want to see me in interesting places! I told her she can always come back later and add the other stuff when she's feeling better.

Oh, yes, I forgot to say, she's not been feeling at her best, and is down in the dumps again. (I'm not allowed to go into details here.) And just what are The Dumps anyway?

To start on an upbeat: this lovely photo is of me (of course) with the first of the nasturtiums. Or should it be nasturtia? Does anyone really care?

We went off on a June afternoon to do some more Art and see Mr Peploe's paintings. Why they call them still lifes (lives?) I really don't know. Some of it is alive, though it's certainly very still...

Most of it I thought was pretty boring, but Alice said we should keep going round and not give up.

Actually, we both rather liked this one of the lobster - the colours were great!

Open these images, and any others you like, in a new tab or window if you want to see them full size.

Accross the road was a rather more ominously titled exhibition. (Click the pic.) I was glad we weren't going in that way!

We only had time for a quick look and haven't got round to going again, yet. Still, it's on til 8th September, so watch this space - or rather, another space, maybe even soon.

One room wasn't deathly at all. It was super fun. Hee, hee, see me!

It's a construction (with the rather off-putting title of It happens when the body is anatomy of time) by this amazing guy called Ernesto Neto. You can read some stuff about him here, but really he just likes making gorgoeous sensual environments for people to take pleasure in. You'll find more pictures on his own website.

The bases of these mushroom stalk things were filled with cloves, cumin and turmeric. The lady in the shop said when it was first installed, you could smell them as soon as you came in the main door! Now there's imagination for you. I think they should call it Sniff Art, don't you?

This exhibition, which we caught a bit later on, was, not surprisingly, at the Scottish National Portrait Gallery, which got done-up relatively recently. It has a nice cafe and shop, too.

You can look up Man Ray on Wikipedia (he had an interesting life!) but you'll get more lovely images if you Google for them. We saw lots and lots of photos in this exhibition, many of them surprisingly small. Alice got quite tired reading all the information. He seemed to know so many famous people!

We were also there to catch the unusual House of Annie Lennox show before it closed. There were some costumes and great videos to see. And she was certainly a terrific singer.  Mostly this visit was Alice's nostalgia trip: she was a fan of the Eurythmics in her younger days - good rhythmic (hah!) music to dance to. 

Annie Lennox is now well known as political activist and philanthropist, especially for AIDS charities.

The picture to the left of Annie Lennox with David Bowie was taken at the Freddie Mercury Tribute Concert for AIDS Awareness in 1992.

Annie  experimented a lot with gender roles and appearance. Always an interesting thing to do, says Alice, who still calls herself a feminist. A long discussion we could get into there, but not now. I'm not sure quite where I stand on issues like that, though I do like a bit of dressing up now and again. But I'm just a simple soul, me.

So, that's us more or less up to date, folks. Alice admits she's cheered up a bit. [I told her it would!]

To wind up, here's another lovely photo of me with a great big nasturtium I just wanted to cuddle up to. No, of course I wouldn't eat it! This variety is called Empress of India, and it's the third year Alice has tried to grow some from seed. Third time lucky. Hurrah! Don't they just cheer you up as well?

Trying to catch up (1): Iain M Banks

Alice keeps putting off writing this post, because she knows she'll have to say something about the death of Iain Banks from cancer on June 9th, last Sunday. She was really quite upset (I say no more, to spare her embarrassment.) And so were thousands of others, too. See all the comments posted by fans and well wishers.

We thought he was going to have just a bit longer, before the big C finally ran its course. His latest and last novel, The Quarry, was brought forward for early publication, but not officially until June 20th. Still, he did get to see a preview copy. Even though the central character is a man dying of cancer, our novelist didn't actually know he himself had the disease until the whole book had already been fully planned and he was nine tenths of the way through the actual typing. His widow, Adele, pointed this out clearly on the Banksophilia website on June 14th. Early reviews are positive: see The Independent and The Guardian for example. Even though the book isn't by her favourite Iain M (Sci-fi) Banks, Alice will read it eventually, when it gets to be available in the Library, and / or comes out in paperback.

Iain Banks gave an amazing last TV interview to Kirsty Wark on BBC2. See quotes from it on the BBC News site. We watched it, tissues at the ready, and he seemed to us to be just the same old character we remembered from Edinburgh Book Festival events - with a fierce political stance (left, of course!) an atheist but optimistically humanist viewpoint (despite the despair of the Culture agent Diziet Sma in State of the Art) plus a naughty sense of humour and that familiar abrupt laugh.

The same characteristics come through in a final print interview with Stuart Kelly.

Some recent articles have focussed on the non-M mainstream novels, especially the brilliant and shocking Wasp Factory (Warning: there are spoilers on Wikipedia!) which was his publishing debut. However, Ken MacLeod, a friend and fellow Scottish writer of SciFi (whose novels Alice has also much enjoyed reading, by the way) has written an appreciation of his with-an-M work, and his supremely wonderful creation of the world of The Culture. Apparently IMB likened writing literary fiction to playing a piano, and writing SF to playing a vast church organ. Yes, sir! says I. [And Alice concurs, if not in bold...]

MacLeod also said: The personality that his fans can see through his writings is very as he was. He was exuberant, curious, compassionate and questioning. That's what he was like. (See the Scotsman article for quotes from other writers too.)

This uniquely talented writer will be sorely missed - but his books will continue to provoke and provide pleasure. See also our post below on 11th April, and the note at the end of  25th April.

Very belated indeed

Oh deary me, you must all be wondering what's happened to us lately.

To tell the truth, Alice has been mired down, she says - No Monkey, not in the mud, but metaphorically! - trying to help someone she knows get through a bureaucratic nightmare: one which isn't a fit topic for this blog. If I just say it's the dreaded ESA50, those in the know will know...

Meanwhile we have passed our First Birthday, having set up this blog on May 13th 2012, though I didn't actually write anything worth reading until the 21st. Hence the single candle here. And the little figure on my knee is  Ganesha, who is reputed to help remove obstacles, so we're honouring him right now. (Right click and open in a new tab for a better view.)

We'll bring you up to date later, when the crisis is passed.

Window box watch & Iain Banks update


One of my recent jobs has been to report on the progress of Alice's bulbs in the window boxes.

On the 21st March, Spring Equinox (here, anyway) the tulips were doing their best, and a few were in bud in each box.

She's got three boxes altogether...

But on the 27th of March it snowed and froze! 

I was glad Alice lent me her hat to keep my ears warm during the inspection. 

There's a white hyacinth in each box, replanted from indoors last year.

At least nothing had died.

This picture was taken on April the 3rd.

That's more like it!

Click on any photo to see a bigger image.
Right click and open in new tab for the full glory!

By the very next day they we were all opening out in the sunshine together.

I felt like staying there even longer, just to feel the warmth on my face.

April the 15th saw them fully open. Gorgeous.

Just as well, since next day the tulip petals had fallen and the gales arrived - so they were overblown and blown over.

Alice was too upset to take a picture of the carnage. She pretended it was just the light was poor, but I know her so well I could tell.

She cheered up on April 23rd, because the Narcissi (that's mini daffodils to you and me) were now in flower. So I was all smiles again as well! Yes, I know what you're going to say, but I was smiling inside, as well.

The (indoor) geraniums are coming out too. 

Never mind that there was wind and rain only ten minutes later...

Today she's just put some Nasturtium seeds to soak. Last year they didn't do too well, so she's going to start them off indoors this time. Those of you blessed with fingers, please cross them.

The wonderful Iain M Banks is back home now, "after a basically brilliant honeymoon / holiday". He says:

Discovering the sheer extent and depth of the feelings people have expressed on the message board over the past two weeks has been truly astounding. I feel treasured, I feel loved, I feel I’ve done more than just pursue the craft I adore and make a living from it, and more than just fulfil the only real ambition I’ve ever had – of becoming a professional writer. I am deeply flattered and touched, and I can’t deny I’ve been made to feel very special indeed.    [And more...]

If you haven't posted a message for him yet, you can still do so. See below for Alice's appreciation.

Iain Banks: officially Very Poorly
[UPDATED 13 APRIL 2013]

No tears have been shed in this household over the death of Margaret Thatcher. I say no more right now, but see the end of this blog below.

Alice, however, has been terribly upset to hear the news that one of her very favourite writers, the inimitable Iain (sometimes with an M) Banks has terminal cancer, and is unlikely to live more than "several months". He announced this on his official website on April 3rd. With a typical wry note, he added, I asked my partner Adele if she will do me the honour of becoming my widow (sorry - but we find ghoulish humour helps).

There is now a special site, Banksophilia: Friends of Iain Banks where one can leave comments, appreciation, good wishes etc. Alice did. On the Updates page, his newly wedded partner told us he is reading them all. She signed off by saying, After Iain proposed, I was referred to as Mrs-B-To-Be. Now that we’re married, I’m Mrs-B-To-Be-As-Was. They sound well matched indeed.

Alice says the reading public is losing a writer of great imagination, wit, humour, integrity and passion. She's read all his Iain M Banks books (the sci-fi ones) and most of the others, with great pleasure - several at least twice, or more.

Her absolute favourite is Use of Weapons, which introduced her to The Culture (a wonderfully envisioned post-scarcity utopia) and boasts what Alice calls a fiendishly brilliant structure. Not one a poor soul like me could hope to follow! Even she admits being somewhat confused at her first reading. There's a thorough discussion of that book in four parts (one by IMB himself) by the Guardian Book Club. If, and only if, you've already read it, there's an interesting review here - but be warned - it reveals the twist at the end, which will spoil your delight if you haven't. That's why these things are called "Spoilers".

We could go on and on about the Culture, the Minds, the inventive lengthy names, the cheeky Drones, the bizarre aliens, the fiendish schemes - but we'll leave you to discover it all for yourself.  Like other contributors to the Guestbook, Alice would have loved the Culture to be true, but the cynic in her was not surprised that they had found us, on Earth, past redemption, and decided to leave us to our own devices. This (not so well-known?) notion is found in a novella, The State of the Art, in the volume of the same name.

Of the more mainstream novels, she particularly enjoyed Steep Approach to Garbadale, a Scottish tale both hilarious and moving. There are some touching parts about the trials and tribulations of being a teenaged male, about which the author writes with great honesty and sympathy both here and elsewhere.

Alice has heard him at a number of Edinburgh International Book Festival events: most memorable being two "double acts" - one with a fellow Scottish sci-fi writer Ken MacLeod, the other with the ebullient Alex Salmond. She usually managed to find a good question to ask, and keep the discussion going. Not "Why the M?" which he's answered so many times.

If you've not read anything by him yet - give it a go!

Monkey and Alice send their love to this amazing man.

As for Thatcher's death and the varying responses, Alice found this striking slogan pictured in The Metro, which she likes to pick up on the bus and browse over a cup of tea. It also featured a few quotes from Glenda Jackson's scathing speech about the political and social legacy of the Thatcher era. You can watch the erstwhile actress turned MP give her passionate delivery on YouTube, or read it in full in Hansard. She was unrepentant, despite later criticism. Good on her, say I.